I grew up in Monterey, Virginia, a small town out in what most people would consider the middle of nowhere. I’m sure all you reading this have heard of it! Our whole county has less than 2,500 people. However, there are a significant number of churches. I used to joke that there were more churches than people.
My mother grew up Presbyterian and continues to faithfully attend the church I grew up in. When I was young there weren’t hardly any children my age at church, although there were some a bit older than me. I rounded the bend into middle and high school, I was often the youngest person in the congregation with my mother often being the next youngest. They had roughly 30-50 regular attendees. I don’t remember many details about my church going experience at that time, but I do remember that 99% of the time I either did not want to go to church or, at best, my feelings on the matter were neutral. My father grew up Methodist but I do not recall him attending any church while I was growing up. Why did Dad get to stay home while I had to go and sit for several boring hours at church? I often tried to get dad to go with us but it wasn’t out of a desire for him to attend… I just wanted him to be as bored as me! When you are a child and you don’t understand most of what the adults are talking about it can be very hard to pay attention and honestly I’m not sure I even wanted to pay attention. As I got older, I pretty much stopped complaining about going to church. I still didn't want to be there but I had accepted that this was just a requirement of living with my mom. When I started singing in the choir things got a bit more enjoyable as I do like to sing and the people of course were nice to talk with and so it became more of a social club for me.
Moving into my adult years, I attended a Presbyterian college, although most people would never know its religious affiliation unless someone told them. The first weekend I spent at college I attended the Presbyterian church across the street. People smiled at me, gave me a bulletin, shook my hand, were friendly… but no one made the extra effort to really engage me. After the service, I left and never went back. From then on, once my friend group was established and when I was at college on the weekends, I would eat brunch in the dining hall with a friend. She was not Christian and therefore didn’t go to church but our other friends all went off on Sunday morning to attend their various churches. One day my breakfast friend asked me why I never went to church like the others. I do not remember what I told her but I do remember her asking. God works in mysterious ways and He will use any means available to try and reach us, even just a question from a young woman who herself didn’t believe in Him. We should never ignore the promptings of the Holy Spirit just because it might come from an unexpected person or place. Unfortunately that question did not lead to a great revival in my life at the time.
After college, I moved back home, and also back to the expectation from my mother of going to church. I still wasn’t attending church out of love for God. I really just didn’t want to deal with “the look” or the controversy that would arise from me not going. During that time my grandparents received an unsolicited copy of the Great Controversy in the mail. They were going to throw it out but as I was an avid reader and one who put all books on pedestals I couldn’t bear to see a book be thrown away. I took it home. I wish I could say that I read it, but I didn't. There are some people, like the apostle Paul, who are literally knocked off their horse and have an amazing conversion experience. However, most people, myself included, seem to lap at the edge of the conversion sea. God would never use force to change our minds or our hearts. He gives us free will and free choice and therefore allows us to make our own decisions. God knew that I would be interested in Him, and He continued to try to reach me but often times, as was the case with me, I think we are too busy to pay attention or to truly search for Him with all our hearts.
At this point in life, I decided to go to community college to earn an extra degree. Previously, I had been attending a women's college and I would be lying if I said I wasn't afraid of ending up alone the rest of my life. The first semester I was there I liked a couple of guys but never had the courage to talk to them and no one made any move to talk to me. I made some guy friends but that's all they were. (On a side note, I found out that one of them actually married a young lady who is also SDA.) At some point during that first semester, I remember praying to God probably the most sincere prayer I've ever made. It went something like this "Please help me find a man to date, who will like me, love me, have things in common with me, want to do things with me, and who is a good Christian man." Although I was not particularly religious, I still believed enough in God to ask Him for help and for a Christian man. I didn't know until later that my mom had actually been praying the exact same prayer.
To be continued…