My co-worker has a little daily challenge devotional and one challenge last week was to go to someone you had a disagreement with and try to make it right. The quoted scripture was Matthew 5:23-24 ESV: “So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” So what if the disagreement has been settled, the other person has moved on, but I am still hanging on to the issue?
A few weeks ago, something happened at work which wasn’t my fault but certain people blamed me for it. I did my best to smooth over the situation and they seemed to be pacified. I thought I had moved on from this situation but found myself making passive aggressive comments about it. This concerned me because communion is coming up and how could I come before God with this sinful attitude? My co-worker told me, and rightly so, that I should ask God to help me forgive the other person. That’s when I realized I had thought moving on meant I had forgiven them, when, in truth, I was really just trying to forget instead of forgive.
Additionally, I thought me forgiving them and God forgiving me finished the forgivingness cycle, however, there was still one more step! “Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips! Do not let my heart incline to any evil, to busy myself with wicked deeds…” “But my eyes are toward you, O God, my Lord; in you I seek refuge; leave me not defenseless!” (Psalm 141: 3-4a, 8 ESV). To completely move on, I must also pray for the Holy Spirit to take the place of my evil thoughts. In Luke 11:24-25, Jesus tells about a person who had an unclean spirit cast out. The spirit then returns finding the house clean but empty and brings back seven worse spirits. After reconciling with someone, and then asking God to help us forgive, then we must also be careful to make sure our “houses” are filled with the Holy Spirit.
I have prayed so much to move on from this seemingly insignificant situation but in the end God knew what was really in my heart. “Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!” (Psalm 139:23-24 ESV). I cannot just move on in any direction, it must be the direction the Lord would lead me in. Only God can help me forgive others, and only He can forgive and take away my sin. He is also the only One who can lead me to move on in the right direction. This is the path to peace and true forgiveness.