“‘Lord, do You want us to command fire to come down from heaven and consume them?’ But He turned and rebuked them, [and said, ‘You do not know what kind of spirit you are of’].” (Luke 9:54b-55 NASB).
Currently my commute audiobook is titled Sitting Pretty by Rebekah Taussig. The author delves into her life living with disability and combating ableism. I would describe ableism as when “able bodied” people, or society, treat disabled people as though they cannot do anything for themselves, have nothing to contribute, and/or ignore their needs. This of course is a very superficial definition and her points run way deeper than what I have room to write about here. While I disagree with some of her opinions (and language… you’ve been warned), I cannot argue about her personal experience. Her book as a whole brings to the forefront something most of us don’t think about on a daily basis, how disability affects all of us and those on the margins feel it the most.
Almost all of us need “liberating devices” to help us through our days whether it is something external like a kick stool in the kitchen (me) or internal, GERD medication (also me), etc. Dr. Taussig discussed how everyone who wears eyeglasses is in fact disabled. How many people do you know either wear them or contacts, or have corrective surgery? Before my Lasik surgery, I couldn’t even get out of bed and make it to the bathroom without my glasses (unless I was sleep walking, true story). I still wear glasses because my sight continues to deteriorate.
Trying to live without eye correction is a horrific prospect to me. However, I remember an interview with several blind people and their reactions shocked me. Dr. Taussig’s book also fell in line with their varying opinions. Not everyone who experiences what we call a disability wants to be “fixed.” Some of those interviewed would not chose to see even if given the opportunity. Their disability is part of them, part of their identity, who they understand themselves to be. We cannot share their same experience, and we should not try to force our opinions on them in regards to what we perceive as their ailment.
What does real help look like? It is listening in order to understand someone else, to let them be heard and giving them actual consideration. It is ok to not understand what someone else is going through. It is ok to listen and still disagree. It is ok to learn and to change our own opinions. As Christians, we are called to have the spirit of Christ, to share the Good News, not to “fix” other people who do not think as we do. Not everyone believed what Jesus had to say, yet He did not bring down the power of heaven to force them to change. Love and love alone should be our guide both in sharing the gospel and in navigating our interactions with others.